I am supposed to blog...

But I just don't have the time. Teaching is pretty intensive, and draining, since all the coarses I teach are new to me. Thus I work more than I get paid for. Resulting in NO time for my own PhD studies waiting for me. I have a revision waiting for me, and I need a whole day to do something with it, at least a whole day. And I simply do not have that amount of time. So my intentions are: - guard my time better: no more doing things extra for the courses I teach. They pay me, I work those hours. No more (okay, perhaps a bit more) - plan at least one WORK day a week for my studies. Now, I have these scattered teaching activities, and I am the only one to blame for that, I see an empty day in my calendar, in wich I plan appointments. From now on my PhD studies are appointments too - look for a job outside this academic path: i am seriously considering that I will never ever apply for a fund. On the one hand I am a bit scared and I think I won't be smart enough. On the other hand I am tired of jumping through hoops just because "they" the commitee, the university, whatever, need to create hoops to make distingishes between applictants. On the personal side: things are not well enough. This month is the second aniversary of us trying to conceive. And next month is the month our baby should/could have been born. Husband has been diagnosed with a depression. Combine that with the season (western hemisphere, falling leaves, cold, less sun, etc. etc.), and this is seriously not the time in which I am anywhere near jolly....